My theme for this week seemed to be things. I saw snippets of shows on people who are overwhelmed by their things, listened to songs about people and their things, got a book at the library about people and their things. And watched 'Into the Wild" where he lets go of all his things except for survival needs. There is a part of me buried inside of me that has the extreme survivalist mentality, but for the most part that is balanced by all these wonderful facets of my ego. However, there is something to using what you have. At my friends graduate exhibit there was a sign, something like 'what if nothing was waste'. I go through moments of consciousness with what I use & buy and how I dispose of it to moments of ignorance. A lot of it fueled by my lifestyle and where I work. This consciousness, it is a consciousness I work towards having to all aspects of my environment, especially my immediate universe. When I clean and organize my home, I feel like I am living in a conscious ecosystem.
Last post, I was speaking of how it takes time to develop 'home'. It is the same with community. Some places I sense community happening around me, but I am not deep in. Other places feel like a wasteland to me. Where I go to work there is a very young community, but also there are still remnants of the farmers fields that not too long ago graced the area. Driving to work yesterday, two birds swept down the wind current over my car and flew directly into a field ahead of me, the field was full of tall grasses and yellow flowers. It was so beautiful. We seem to never of had the ability to live with the land by ourselves. From the beginning we were taking the skins of other animals to keep warm.
It is raining, and I am craving my garden. I am craving the earth. I am craving silence, and being solitary, and being within loving embraces. I broke open a maple twirler thingy and inhaled deep, it smelled of green and freshness. That scent sits just so in the nose. It is something I could breath for a very long time.
